What Now?

A few months back, my wife and I took our kids to Disneyland. Overall, the trip was a success, with one notable exception. The most difficult part of our trip actually wasn't even in California. No, it was trying to reserve a hotel room online. 

We tried Travelocity, Priceline, Kayak, and the website of every major hotel chain we could think of. Denied. With extreme prejudice. Why? We have four kids, that's why. Yes, four. The vast majority of hotels do not allow families of six to book a hotel room online. Obviously, we were able to get it done. By phone. 

I realize this is not the most fascinating story. I apologize. But, it does relate to the tragedy in Aurora, Colorado. I'll get to that in a minute.

These past few days, I've been involved in Facebook discussions with a cousin in the Seattle area and a friend in Arizona. Like me, and so many others, they're upset with the Aurora shooting. We were asking, what do we do now? Again, like so many others.

Once I started asking that question, I did a little online digging based on curiosity. Where do I, and everyone else, find out how we can help? I figured there must be some organization that counters the NRA. I didn't know of one offhand, but I don't know a lot of things, so I searched. I Googled anti-gun organizations. The first three links were articles written by gun activists listing anti-gun celebrities. I'm not kidding. I couldn't find a seemingly strong gun control group among the first page of links.* That explains the silence.

What happens when there's a natural disaster anywhere in the world? Aid is sent ASAP. The Red Cross is mobilized. The National Guard is sent out. Camera crews are there faster than anyone else. Celebrities hold telethons and special concerts. An eight hundred phone number is set up, donations are requested and sent. En masse. If it's a foreign country, the nearest naval ships are sent with food, water, medical supplies, etc. You know the drill.

So, where's the drill for Aurora?

Ever notice anytime a gunman is involved in an American tragedy none of those same emergency responses are activated? Is it because there's actually someone to blame? Is it because the tragedy was caused by humans instead of Mother Nature? What is it? Granted, a hurricane or something similar causes far more structural damage than a lone gunman, but that is beside the point.

Aide is needed. It may not be rebuilding actual structures, but that doesn't demean its importance. Feelings of trust and security need to be rebuilt. Families can be broken and damaged just as if they were made of brick and wood and stone. They need to be rebuilt too. There are ways to accomplish that. But, someone has to step up and make the first move. And we all know it.

I'm beginning to wonder if we're so charitable at other times because we know that Mother Nature is random. We can't predict her or stop her. No one can reliably foresee a tsunami or hurricane or tornado or earthquake or flash flood or a lightning strike that causes a massive forest fire. We realize that and we sympathize when it happens, because we know it could be us. But, what happened in Aurora could also happen to us. That's a far more sobering and disturbing thought.

The more we learn about the people inside that movie theatre, the more we see ourselves, I think. At least three of the victims were men trying to save their girlfriends. All three succeeded. All three were killed. All three were several years from their thirtieth birthdays. How many of us, man or woman, would do the same? I'd like to think most of us would. A man was killed on his twenty-seventh birthday, and just shy of his one year wedding anniversary. How many of us go to the movies for our birthdays? How many of us have loved ones we would die to protect? How may of us attend the premiere of a highly anticipated movie? That could have been us. And that's a scary thought.

A six-year-old girl was killed. Which brings us back to the blame game I mentioned earlier. I've already heard people blaming the girl's mother. I questioned her myself. What's a six-year-old girl doing at any showing of that movie? The truth is, it's none of my business. Or anyone else's. The girl is dead. Her mother is critically wounded. And yet, some people insist on blaming that mother, as if she could have seen this coming. Are we any different than her?

We've all made parenting errors. How many of our kids heard and used their first swear words after listening to us? How many of us have forgotten to actually buckle in our baby after placing her into the car seat? How many of us have made similar errors in judgment that could have been disastrous? How many of us have paid as heavy a price as this mom? Let's move on.

I saw on Facebook a picture and blurb of a Florida man in his seventies who recently stopped a bank robbery because he was carrying a licensed pistol. The point being if a few of the patrons in the movie theatre had their own guns they could've taken out the gunman before he caused as many deaths and injuries as he did. I have several problems with this line of thinking.

First, the shooter was covered in armor from head to toe. Any bullet fired at him would have had no effect. On him anyway. The gunman naturally would've taken swift and deadly response to anyone shooting at him, and quite possibly any bystanders next to him.

Second, blaming anyone for going to the movies unarmed just seems perverse to me. I wonder if I should bring my Glock to Batman. Just in case. Who thinks that? If I ever do, I'm moving to a new location shortly thereafter. I don't live in Kabul for that reason. Many reasons, actually.

Lastly, maybe no one had a gun with them that night because most people don't like the idea of it. I know I don't. The old west is gone. Most of us don't carry guns with us for a reason. We don't want to. Ever notice in Western movies and television shows that no one smiles? Maybe that was one reason why. That and wooden toilet seats. I don't think wearing a gun makes you any safer. Just like having a calculator doesn't make you any smarter.

Why do we do this? Why do we look to blame instead of to solve? Why is it so difficult for a family of six to book a hotel room online, but so easy for one man to purchase guns, ammo, and body armor? Why don't our politicians bring up their ideas and thoughts on gun control until they're asked on national television or immediately after a tragedy? The answer to those questions are simple. Because we allow it.

Whenever there's a large enough outcry over anything, something happens. Politicians need voters. Without voters, there's no money and no power, and that simply won't do. The truth is, if we want things to change, we need to step up. We need to stop blaming and start solving.

We need to brainstorm. We need to talk. We need to try new ideas. Then try again. Then try some more. Try. Try. Try.

We need to ask our elected leaders their thoughts on gun control. We need to ask why there isn't a system to track online sales of assault weapons, ammunition, and body armor. Think about it. What rational reason is there for anyone to buy what the Aurora gunman used that night?

Look how quickly and massively things have changed at our airports. Yeah, it's a pain in the ass. A girl can feel like she's lost her virginity to a TSA agent. Hell, so can a guy. But, they're both more likely to get to their destination safely. We all are. No one enjoys taking off their shoes at the airport, or buying hair gel and sunscreen in three ounce clear containers. But, we do it. Annoying or not, you have to admit, it seems to be working.

Steps can be made to make buying automatic weapons online visible to the proper authorities. What would've happened if an FBI agent in Denver was notified that some graduate student dropout had been buying automatic weapons and thousands of rounds of ammunition? Everything used that night were bought over a period of at least four months. What if one of those purchases had raised the eyebrows of any law enforcement officer? Think what else would have been discovered. Think what might have been avoided. Then try not to scream in frustration.

Things can get done. If we demand it. Again. And again. And again. It's up to us. Whether it should be or not, doesn't matter. That's the way it is. Politicians have annoyed us since ancient Rome. Let's return the favor. Let's get organized. Let's get mobilized. Let's get LOUD.

Let's. Get. Busy.


*I tried the same Google search last night. This time there was a link to the "Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence" petition being sent to President Obama and Governor Romney. I signed it and encourage others to do the same. It's a start. Here's the link: http://www.bradycampaign.org/

Guns

I'm guessing most, if not all, of us have seen or heard the sentiment, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people."

True enough. We've been killing each other without guns since humans first graced this planet with our presence. People do kill without guns and we do so quite effectively. But, guns help people kill people. A lot of people. A lot of innocent, good people. Including twelve in Aurora, Colorado. 

In less than forty-eight hours after the ambush, I've seen several editorials on both sides of the gun control debate. I can't help but feel a sense of deja vu. Some well-armed gunman enters a crowded, public place and opens fire for no apparent reason. People die. More are wounded. Members of the media swarm in like locusts. Social networking kicks into overdrive. Guns are the problem. No, they're not, we're the problem. If everyone had a gun, like in other countries, he would've been killed in nothing flat. Americans worship violence, what do you expect? Blah, blah, blah.  

Same old. Same old. 

Apparently, gunmen like the coward (who I won't name) in Colorado, feel the need to impress upon the rest of us living folk how bullied, harassed, oppressed, frustrated, smart, lethal, and cowardly they are. I, personally, am quite impressed. Is that enough? I'm truly impressed with the intelligence and, uh, bravery it took to plan and implement this attack on a movie theatre and booby-trap your apartment. Well done. Mission accomplished. Will this stupid bullshit stop now?

I'm sure in the heads of gunmen like the Colorado coward, it makes sense to arm themselves to the teeth, wear enough armor to last through a showing of Eat Pray Love in Afghanistan, find a public place with hundreds of unarmed people, and open fire. Apparently, these victims harmed this man in some awful way that demanded their death while watching a Batman movie. I'm sure the teenagers were especially mean. They can be so cruel, after all. Especially against a medical student. 

He must have also thought these people were all armed, as well. I know this because in addition to the protection he wore, he brought tear gas (or something similar), a gas mask, multiple guns, and hundreds of rounds of ammo. Yes, this is truly a brave man to attack these seemingly harmless people. It's a good thing he could legally get his hands on those weapons and ammunition.

Obviously, this man is disturbed. He might have flipped like this anyway, whether he had a machine gun, shot gun, and two handguns, or no guns at all. It's entirely possible he would've killed these same twelve people and wounded the same fifty-eight others by using a blow-dart gun and bow and arrows while wearing jeans and a hoodie. He could have booby-trapped his apartment Rambo-style with sharpened sticks and logs dropped from above. Surely, it would've been as dangerous and deadly as the IEDs and God knows what else he used instead. But, somehow I doubt it.

I'm quite sure the NRA will come forth with the same, tired exclamations of how tragic and senseless this episode is; they pray for the victims' families, and continue to herald the responsible, constitutional right to bear arms. Been there. Heard that.  

It doesn't matter what the NRA says or what everyone else says. Nothing is going to change. This awful, stomach clenching tragedy will eventually pass. After a few months, or years, if we're lucky, another similar tragedy will occur somewhere else. Others will die. Others will be wounded. More outrage. Cue tape.

Unless we actually starting doing something different, nothing different will happen. 

Posting our proclamations to pray for those families and friends of the victims on Facebook, along with our questions of why and how such a thing could happen, and our rantings for/against gun control and violence won't change a damn thing. I know. I posted similar thoughts myself. It feels right to do those things, and maybe it is. But, it also doesn't feel like enough.

Nothing will change. Unless we actually do something with our fear and weariness of the same old problems. 

It's happened before, and rather recently. Close to four years ago actually. You think a black man named Barack gets elected over a war hero any other way? He made so much money during his election against Hillary Clinton and John McCain he broke every national record in regards to campaign donations and spending. (Ironically, a man named Mitt is breaking those records. But, that's another topic for another day.) According to the Washington Post, Obama raised over half a billion dollars online alone, with the average donation being eighty dollars. 

How did that happen? Simple. People finally reached the boiling point. Enough was enough. Most people didn't care what color he was, or what his name was, or where he was born. The size of our problems finally outweighed the normal political propaganda bullshit. People knew eighty bucks wasn't much, but hey, it's what they could give. Good luck to you. Guess what happens when millions upon millions of Americans have that same attitude and take that same step? Things change.

I realize people are upset with Obama and want him out. Some people think he hasn't done enough, or they disagree with what he's done. Of course, many people have the exact opposite point of view. The point is, the man doesn't get elected if we, as a country, don't decide to try something different. Remember, whether you agree with the man's health care changes or not, the Supreme Court upheld it. Our national health care system is changing. No other president has ever done that. 

The NRA has more money and power than its opponents. The gun companies have more money and power than their opponents. The politicians supporting both have more money and power then those running against them. Therefore, nothing changes. 

What if all the people who posted on Facebook and Twitter their support and outrage and prayers for the victims and their families in Aurora actually decided to do something more?  What if Americans gave the same amount of money and attention to this situation as we did for the tsunami victims in Japan and the earthquake victims in Haiti? What would happen? What would change?

Interesting questions, I think. Maybe things would stay the same and in six months some other gun toting prick would do the same thing, and we'd be running up the same hamster wheel. But, what if something else happened? Something that changes lives and maybe even saves a few. 

What if wasn't legal to buy an "AK type" automatic weapon? What if it wasn't legal to buy a drum clip with a hundred rounds inside it? Would that pathetic coward have still found a way to purchase those weapons? Or the next loser with the same idea? Would they have been caught if they did try? I don't know. 

Seems like the chances are fifty-fifty. I'd take those odds. We pay millions every month for a pipe dream called the lottery with far worse odds of winning. Probably about the same odds as getting shot in a movie theatre. Or at a high school. Or a middle school. Or an insurance office. Or a factory. Or an army base. Or at a university. Seems like those odds are climbing. 

What are we going to do about it?

Man Flag

This morning over breakfast I was talking with my brother-in-law. Not surprisingly, the talk turned to bacon. It didn't matter that we weren't eating bacon. Either way, many of our conversations rightfully turn towards the wonder that is bacon. Someway, somehow the idea of a man flag popped in my head. 

When that thought did show itself, I began to dig deeper into what would be on such a flag. It would be blue, of course. Navy. That seems properly manly to me. So is black. But, it's also depressing. I don't want that. This flag should be inspirational, and, uh, manly. 

It should go without saying that a man flag must have the most important animal ever created grace its fabric. That animal could only be, you guessed it, the noble pig. What other animal has given man so much pleasure? Yes, the Bald Eagle is very impressive and is the rightful symbol of our country. That could never, and should never, be changed. But, I'm not talking about replacing our country's flag or national symbol. I'm talking about glorifying a truly remarkable specimen of nature upon the man flag. Think what this amazing animal gives us. Bacon! Ham! Pork chops! Bacon! 

The pig also has other important qualities that earn and demand our respect. They are not endangered. There are plenty of pigs and that's the way it should always be. I can only imagine the horrors that would beset this planet of ours if there were ever, God forbid, a pig shortage. We can handle almost any other malady: tsunamis, tornadoes, heat waves, rising unemployment and gas prices, high crime rate, poverty, zombie apocalypse. The list goes on and on. We find ways to adapt to such difficult challenges. But, that is nothing compared to what would happen if there were ever a shortage, or rationing, of bacon. Shudder. I prefer not to think about it.

Another quality of the pig that I appreciate is that it's not exactly a difficult animal to catch. They are not swift. They don't fly. They don't sting. They have no talons, rows of razor-sharp teeth, or other defensive weapons that we fear. They are not quiet or stealthy. People used to actually grease pigs up. Men (of course) tried to catch them in front of crowds at county fairs. Why this became such a phenomenon, I don't know. Perhaps, they promised bacon after the event. The point is that Ray Charles could track and kill a pig. And I'm thankful for that.

I realize I'm alienating vegetarian men (both of them) and a major religion who don't eat pork. Tough shit.

Obviously, there would be other things on the man flag. There would be an ode to sports. I picture this part to be holographic. With our technology, there must be a way to have multiple logos of sports teams within one impressive holograph. It would no doubt cause most men to stare for lengthy periods of time trying to find our respective favorite teams' logos. This would take up large amounts of our valuable time, but sports do that anyway. 

Women would also have to be included in some form. And, no, I don't mean like that silhouette on those classy mud flaps on so many pickup trucks and semis. Seriously, on a mud flap? Whose brilliant idea was that? Probably the same kind of men who buy those things. I would never endorse such a version of the female form anyway. Whenever I see that specific woman, I think of one thing. Pole. Since I've vowed that none of my daughters will ever adorn a pole, I can't allow such a thing on the man flag.

This is sensitive territory. The biggest problem is, no matter what woman, in whatever way, is put on the man flag, wives and girlfriends the world over will be questioning if their husbands and boyfriends think the flag woman is prettier than they are. That is a major problem. Couples have enough to fight about. The man flag should not be one of them. It taints it. I won't allow that to happen to bacon.

My idea is this. The flag will have a blank space. That area is for each man to add a photo, or avatar if you will, of his love. (That love must be real and reciprocated, gentlemen. I don't want to see a thousand flags with Megan Fox on it. It would be wrong and would cause fighting within our union. That can't be allowed.) It goes without saying that the woman in question can choose what photo, or part of her body, is emblazoned on the flag. But, she must allow something up there. Each flag must be complete. It's in the contract that comes in every package, along with the rules of treatment. In short, it must be treated with the respect it deserves. 

It may be used as a bib, but only when on an important date. It will be flown at half-mast after every playoff loss your team suffers. It must never touch the hands of a vegetarian. If it is flown rigid for over four hours, consult a physician. 

That brings us to alcohol, beer specifically. I picture logos of as many beers as possible along the edges of the flag. They would be small, but they would be there. In fact, there could be numerous rows of beer logos, if needed. Perhaps, those inner rows should have poker chips and playing cards instead. Hmmm. We may need to take that issue to a vote at the next meeting.

That's about it. I toyed with the idea of having the pig be scratch 'n sniff. Bacon. But, that would confuse intoxicated men. We couldn't have our sacred flag damaged by teeth and frustration. That would be wrong.

I know what some of you are thinking. What about the woman flag? Those of you who know me well, know that I have a wife and four daughters. Surely, I would be qualified to at least theorize about what would adorn the woman flag. Uh, no I wouldn't. I am not the brightest bulb in the box. I commit acts of stupidity on a daily basis. If I'm lucky, it's just once a day. But, I am not suicidal. 

Which brings me back to stupid. I'll surmise about two things that might find their way onto the female flag. I'm guessing having an image of a male completing a common household chore (vacuuming, washing dishes, cleaning the toilet) would be somewhere in the middle area. I'm also assuming they would use the same idea of using a photo of their specific spouse or boyfriend for the task in question. Either that, or Channing Tatum. The words, "I'm wrong", in every language, would no doubt be present, as well. Beyond that, I'm done. Someone else can take it from here.

I really think the man flag should happen. It would unite men of all races. After all, we have so many differences. Actually, we don't. But, it would be another reason to get together to drink beer and watch sports, to high-five each other for other people's accomplishments, to grill various kinds of meat in properly cool aprons and t-shirts, to play fantasy sport after fantasy sport, to play poker, to watch pay-per-view sporting events and Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. And, of course, to eat bacon. 

What could be more important than that?